“Your ego is the most expensive thing you’ll ever own.”
One of the biggest obstacles for success (in life) is ego. I’ve seen too many failed businesses and wrecked relationships due to ego problems.
Small things that could be remedied with a little humility and perspective cost them everything.
And all of us have one. This fact makes us susceptible at any time to get our ego out of whack, take offense and/or get our feelings hurt.
I’m not saying egos are bad. When in check, it gives us the guts and grit to get things done and persist through challenges. Proper ego is self-assurance and constructive stubbornness. These are advantageous qualities for thriving.
But there are always times when we can get things out of alignment and potentially damage important relationships.
Here are four indicators of an unhealthy ego. Learning how to spot these things will save time, money, and most of all, relationships.
I borrowed this term from Brian Regan. If a person’s ego is bloated, they will talk about themselves too much. We’ve all seen that guy that turns every conversation into a story about himself. Healthy egos listen more than they talk. Go here to listen to Brian talk about me-monsters.
2. Resent other peoples’ recognition:
Unhealthy egos hate it when others get the recognition they feel like they deserve. Resentment and hurt are felt instead of congratulations. Healthy egos do the right thing and don’t care who gets the credit.
One of the first signs of a hazardous ego is when people stop learning. When you become unteachable you stop growing and think there is nothing new to learn. Learning is a sign of humility, which is a cornerstone of a properly aligned ego.
4. Critical of others:
De-edifying and criticizing people instead of complementing and encouraging is a sure symptom. Tearing down of others happens because inflated egos like to judge people and their actions. Being secure in one’s identity removes the need to compare oneself to others.
Great relationships hinge upon healthy egos and a successful life requires strong relationships. It’s funny how life has little checks and balances like this to guide us down the right path.
Also published on Medium.